Fading out…and in

Is it odd when you suddenly realize that not so suddenly you’ve stopped doing things that are important to you? When you see your life in a perspective not seen for a while, or through a vision that you’ve lost sight of? What about when you remember the things you used to wait for, long for, savor moments of and you realize that you’re not waiting for those things any more.

I’m not the only one…a cupbearer of the Pharoah’s says what I feel like lately “Today I am reminded of my shortcomings….” (Genesis 41:9) When you keep going, and everything’s “fine” and then you get a little jolt. Ha…you thought everything was fine, but look once again. Did you forget about me? I feel like a gentile when Paul wrote “I myself am convinced, my brothers, that you yourselves are full of goodness, complete in knowledge and competent to instruct one another. I have written you quite boldly on some points, as if to remind you of them again, because of the grace God gave me to be a minister of Christ Jesus to the Gentiles with the priestly duty of proclaiming the gospel of God, so that the Gentiles might become an offering acceptable to God, sanctified by the Holy Spirit.” (Romans 15:14-16)

I don’t know what to compare a good reminder to….it’s like one of those really great things, that you know is good for you, but you forget how much it hurts at the same time…it’s like, ‘Oh yeah! Thanks for reminding me….but ouch, did I really go there?’

Slowly fading in & out….up & down…..one shade to another and back again. I love what it tells us in Hebrews 10:32 “Remember those earlier days after you had received the light, when you stood your ground in a great contest in the face of suffering.” This is exactly what I need to do. and as I ponder, “I remember your ancient laws, O Lord, and I find comfort in them.” (Psalm 119:52)

Remind me Lord, of your great glory, your power, love & omnipotence. Remind me of your faithfulness, and how you satisfy my thirst. You are my Light….”Light is sweet, and it pleases the eyes to see the sun.” (Eccl. 11:7)

Nothing to Say—

Do you ever have so much to say that you don’t say anything? Can’t say anything? Would rather shut up than say what you’d like to?

Are the thoughts so vivid & alarming that you shock yourself…or you think that no one would really understand? And you wonder if God is preparing you for yet one more thing while crying because you think that your last weekends memories were just that…preparing you for what happened yesterday?

Since I really have “nothing” to say….at least not here anyway (I just need some deep conversations with God right now)…I’ll give you some verses that I’ve been thinking on.

“Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love & good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another –and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” (Hebrews 10:23-25)

“Remember those earlier days after you had received the light, when you stood your ground in a great contest in the face of suffering. Sometimes you were publicly exposed to insult & persecution; at other times you stood side by side with those who were so treated. You sympathized with those in prison and joyfully accepted the confiscation of your property, because you knew that you yourselves had better and lasting possessions. So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded.” (Hebrews 10:32-35)

This is the hope I hold onto. This is something I know to be true & evident in my life and in those around me. Let’s encourage one another, though we suffer….let us remember Who Christ is…that is our hope.